


24 hours with an NHL Player – Starring Jack Zimmermann

by emimix3



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Chirping, Cooking, Discussion of Mental Health, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Filming, Jewish Jack Zimmermann, M/M, Post-Canon, Routine, Social Media, Video, YouTube, discussion of eating disorders
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-13
Updated: 2019-08-16
Packaged: 2020-08-21 00:03:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20236573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emimix3/pseuds/emimix3
Summary: Hi everyone!More than one person asked me what a professional athlete’s routine was. Considering that I didn’t have much of a trip to do to find one, as the cryptid living with me happen to play hockey professionally, I asked Jack Zimmermann, co-captain of the Providence Falconers, nerd extraordinaire and boyfriend of yours truly if I could let the camera roll for 24 hours so he’d show his routine. He said yes if I took his bathroom cleaning chores for the week. What I wouldn’t do for y’all…





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I wanted to write this for a while now, I finally got around it...
> 
> CW: Discussion of eating disorders. To avoid; jump from "I guess I get why you never wanted to eat my baking" to "Bitty squeezes Jack’s hand, quickly." (there's two big chunks of text in between)  
There's a _lot_ of emphasis about food and meals in the whole fic, though

**24 hours with an NHL Player – Starring Jack Zimmermann **

**Bitty - OMG Check Please!  
** _Published on Nov 2, 2017 _

Hi everyone!  
More than one person asked me what a professional athlete’s routine was. Considering that I didn’t have much of a trip to do to find one, as the cryptid living with me happen to play hockey professionally, I asked Jack Zimmermann, co-captain of the Providence Falconers, nerd extraordinaire and boyfriend of yours truly if I could let the camera roll for 24 hours so he’d show his routine. He said yes if I took his bathroom cleaning chores for the week. What I wouldn’t do for y’all…  
This was shot last Monday, which was a light practice day for the Falconers, and made in agreement with the staff and the PR team. Thanks to them!

  
★ Jack’s Insta: jcbzmmnn01  
★ Jack’s Twitter: @jlz01

★ My Insta: omgcheckplease15  
★ My Twitter: @omgcheckplease

* * *

The camera is filming a bed. It’s dark, but the shutters aren’t fully closed so there’s just enough light to see two forms cuddling under the covers.

A generic alarm rings.

Both forms are groaning. One of them, Jack, moves to turn it off.

“Uuuuuuur-” Bitty groans.“It’s too early.”

“I know,” Jack says, laying back and hugging him close. “Let’s stay here all day.”

“All week.”

“_All life_.”

“Goals.”

Still, Bitty sits up in bed, Jack’s arms still around his waist.

“Nooo… Stay here,” Jack whines. “I’ll call in sick… Let’s not shoot today…”

“It’s already filming sweetpea. Dex helped me setting the camera up so that it began to film two minutes before your alarm.”

“You betrayed me too…” Jack says, throwing his arms over his face in ultra-dramatic fashion.

Cut. Bitty is in the kitchen, still half-asleep and rubbing his eyes with one hand and he’s talking to the camera with a low voice.

“Hi everyone. Today is a special video – we’re going to follow Jack for the whole day. A lot of people asked questions about his routine as an athlete and all that, so what’s better than to show you? It’s six AM and it’s way too early but we’re going to go _jog_. Well right now he’s praying, and I just cut the bunnies’ breakfast and I’m starting to fix Jack and I a quick thing to drink- oh, here he is.”

He turns the camera to show Jack, who was entering the kitchen, adjusting a grey T-shirt and already wearing athletic shorts. He’s followed by two rabbits.

“Let’s grab something to eat and let’s go, Bittle,” he says, putting on his cap.

“I literally signed for that.”

Cut. In the kitchen, Jack is drinking a tall glass of lemon water and scrolling on his cellphone with a protein bar in his mouth. He looks grumpy.

“Not happy to spend the whole day with me sweetheart?” Bitty, behind the camera, asks.

“I’m not a morning person.”

He took a few seconds, and adds:

“I’m not an evening person either. Or an afternoon person. I’m not even a person.”

“Indeed you’re not, a _person_ would never wear those,” Bitty says, and he lowers the camera to show the neon yellow running shoes Jack is sporting.

“Hey.”

Cut.

Jack is jogging, Bitty is next to him. Providence is slowly coming to life at this early hour. Bitty made sure to not begin to record in their street.

“So, Jack, where are we running today?”

“We’re going to do the long run- I usually run a loop but, well, the fridge is _empty_ so we’re going to run up to the farmer’s market and walk back home with the groceries. Hence the backpack,” Jack explained, pointing at the straps on his shoulders, “that and Bittle needs me to carry all his equipment for him.”

“Hey! I’m carrying the camera and I do not have a GoPro, Mister.”

They both stop at a red light, jogging in place.

“How often do you jog?” Bitty asks.

“Every day,” Jack replies immediately. “Usually when I wake up early, I run outside. Most of the time Bittle tells me to fuck off and let him sleep so I run alone. On off days, when I sleep longer, I do a shorter run on the treadmill. (The light turns green, and they resume their jog, going towards the park) My routine in the morning from the moment I get up is set in stone; I dress, I pray, I have a really quick first breakfast, and then I run. After that I get a shower and then, the best part of the day, I have my second breakfast.”

“You’re such a hobbit.”

“Okay, so first of all, _gnome_, my feet aren’t _that_ hairy-”

Cutaways of the run on catchy, but not-too-intense music. A few brief shots of Jack in the street, then of Bitty in the park because Jack had stolen the camera – back to Jack running in the park, and then a shot of Jack posing next to three geese who were chilling near the pound. Then, at least six shots of Jack stopping to pet dogs. They reach the farmer’s market, where they stop to run, but there are still two or three shots of them buying food.

Cut. Bitty set the camera to shoot the two of them. They’re at the farmer’s market. They’re a bit sweaty and are showing off the big reusable bags that were in Jack’s backpack. The four bags are filled to the brim.

“We buy this much food like, twice a week,” Bitty explains. “This boy eats a lot.”

“And _this boy_ bakes even more.”

“Don’t you dare complain,” Bitty retorts, with an irritated but fond tone.

“Haha,” Jack says, before turning back to the camera, “Eat local and in-season, guys. Tomatoes aren’t winter and spring vegetables.”

Cut. Jack and Bitty are in Jack’s car, the camera propped on the dashboard to frame them both. Bitty is driving.

“Okay, so. I of course had a memory card issue so I haven’t filmed breakfast. Jack, what did you eat?”

“Eggs.”

“Obviously. You and your eggs.”

“There’s this lady in the farmer’s market,” Jack begins, “we bought so many eggs that she got several more chickens and she comes deliver us at home full baskets of their eggs twice a week. We’re the ones who named the new chickens. Also I only eat half of those eggs, Bittle bakes with the other half.”

“And who eats my baking?”

“I also had pancakes,” Jack says, ignoring him. “With fruits and yaourt.”

“With _what?_”

“Eh? Yaourt?”

“_Yoghurt?”_

“That’s what I said, Bits!”

“No, you said ‘_yawoout’_.”

“How are you doing that with your mouth.”

“Jack, can _you_ even say ‘_yoghurt’_?”

“Yoghuwt.”

“Gosh, love, you’re so cute,” Bitty gushes.

“Wallah descends d’un ton.”

Bitty takes a left with the car, still chuckling.

“On a more serious note, where are we going?”

“Bittle, if you have no idea of the way you should have let me drive.”

“Jack, I try to engage an interaction for the sake of the video.”

“’_To engage an interaction_’? That’s what the youngsters call it those days?”

“_Jack_.”

“Ha,” he sniggers. “Sorry. Well, we’re going to the rink for practice. I usually arrive earlier than most of the guys, because as an alternate captain I have a lot of meetings and also because I like practicing.”

“You like practicing. Of course you do.”

“Plus today Bitty is here so he’s gonna practice with us too so it’ll be great.”

“Oh. But Bitty is _not_ going to do that.”

“But Bitty doesn’t have a choice.”

Cut. Bitty is running some drills with the Falcs. Someone else is holding the camera. He’s having a race with Tater, both of them running while pushing weights (Bitty, _way_ _less_ than Mashkov). Jack and the others are on the sidelines, watching the scene while drinking water and laughing.

Bitty wins the race, but ends up laying on the floor, trying to catch his breath. The camera gets closer.

“I’m out of shape,” he finally manages to say.

“You look like the dead cuttlefish we have seen on the beach the other day,” Jack states, lightly touching his boyfriend’s arm with his foot.

Bitty looks straight at the camera, that zooms on him.

Cutaways of the practice on intense music. The shots are shorts, so that you can’t exactly know what the guys are doing and how well they are doing it. Shots of on-ice and off-ice practices are mixed – Bitty participates in a few of them – and so are some close-ups of the players being focused and taking notes during the meeting with the coaches. It ends up with stretching.

Cut. They’re in the locker room. Jack is only wearing a towel and his cap.

“Bits, do you really need a shot of me half-naked?”

“No.”

Cut. Jack is in the nook, sitting at a table with some of the guys. They’re eating lunch.

Tater is on his right, Marty on his left, Thirdy next to him, and you can hear Snowy talking next to Bitty.

“So, Jack, what now?”

“Lunch,” Jack replies, a ravioli in his mouth. “It’s spinach and nuts and cabbage and potato pierogi. Made ‘em yesterday.”

“They’re okay,” Tater, who had stolen one and was now licking his fingers, says. “Grandma’s are better.”

“Of course they are, she’s your _grandma._”

“I was more talking about your schedule…” Bitty corrects Jack. “You talked about food enough already. And it’s only lunch time.”

“Oh. Well. It’s light training day so after team lunch I’m going back home to do the chores and take a nap and I’ll do some yoga after-”

“It’s light training day Jack. You light trained enough,” Marty cuts him off, talking with his mouth full of sandwich. “Personally I’m going back home and I’m gonna watch an entire afternoon worth of Pawn Stars.”

“And that, Marty,” Jack says, “is why I have a Calder and a Lady Byng and a Conn Smythe and a Hart and you don’t.”

Marty don’t even have the time to get offended before all the guys around begin to scream to boo him. On the video, between the “_OOooohh_”, you can only hear a muffled “You fucking deserved that,” from Thirdy, that is subtitled.

Cut. Jack and Bitty are back in the car, Bitty is driving once again.

“We should play some Dragon Age tonight,” Jack proposes.

“Oh, yes. We should finish the werewolves quest.”

“I think the plot twist will be that the werewolves were nice all along.”

“They _killed people_, Jack.”

“And? It’s Dragon Age? In 90% of the cutscenes you’re covered in the blood of your enemies!”

Bitty nods at that. Jack turns back toward the road, and after a few seconds, he asks:

“Can I sing a song? Have it on the video?”

“You can do what you want, sweetpea. I’m not your mom.”

“That would be awkward,” Jack admits, already browsing his phone to look for the instrumental he wanted.

Botty frowns at the first notes playing in the car. Something quite aggressive and electronic, that Jack didn’t usually listened to.

“It’s _Brothers_ by Rilès and I sing this for Shitty.”

The music drops, and Jack _raps_:

“_I came in this game like a motherfuckin' rat, like I was starving for things I never thought I could have-”_

Bitty just turns towards Jack, shocked. Good thing that the traffic is pretty packed. Jack raps the whole first verse without even stumbling upon his words, which is rare enough to note. The chorus is sung.

“_Yesterday we were brothers. Oh now we're enemies! Numb and my time ain't free… Yesterday we were brothers. Oh now we're enemies! Understand "fuck your eager"- Yeah you been too greedy-”_

They’re stopped when Jack finishes the chorus. Bitty is gawking like an idiot at him.

“Since when do you rap?”

“Thirty seconds, I’d say,” Jack replies, checking the time stamp of the instrumental on his phone.

“And what the hell did Shitty do to you to deserve _that_?”

“Oh, don’t worry,” Jack says, and he looks straight at the camera. There’s a small closeup on him. “He knows.”

Bitty is still turned towards him, but only his eyes are moving to look at the camera. He has no idea of what is happening.

Cut. Bitty and Jack are still in the car, music blasting and singing the chorus of _“(I Can Get No) Satisfaction_”. It’s loud but they’re laughing.

Cut. Bitty just got inside their apartment, Jack is right behind him, touching the mezuza as he enters. He right away gets rid of his shoes and drops his hockey bag on the floor. One of their two rabbits, the bigger one, ran to the door to jump around and greet his humans home – Jack crouches down to the floor to pet him.

“So, Jack, what are we doing?”

“Uh. Nap.”

“Wrong answer. Let’s start the washing machine first. It’s not that our workout clothes smell bad, but boy, do they smell bad.”

“Noooo…” Jack whines.

“What, ‘noooo’?”

“I wanna take a nap.”

“We can do that after?”

“But! You said that as a sweetpea, I could do what I want, you’re not my mom.”

“I can’t believe this. You’re always the one after my ass when I don’t want to do my half of the chores-”

“You _never_ want to do your half of the chores, Bittle, but _now_ that there’s a camera…”

“I feel like I’m dealing with a five-year-old.”

“You understand my daily pain, then.”

Cut. Jack is programming the full washing machine, Bitty is filming him.

“Did you know that I met Shitty at the laundry room in Samwell?” Jack asks to Bitty.

“Actually, no, I didn’t.”

“It’s a story for another time. My mom was here. More or less. There was fire. But not from us.”

“_What_?”

“I’ll tell you about it if you’re the one ironing the clothes,” Jack teases.

“Oh God. You’re lucky I love you and I’m a weak gossip lover.”

Cut. The camera is set up in the bedroom, as it was in the morning – only this time, only the curtains are closed to diffuse the light of the early afternoon in the bedroom. Jack is already in bed and Bitty getting in it. They’re in comfy shorts and T-shirts. Both rabbits are on the bed too.

“How long do you nap?” Bitty asks, as he sits next to Jack.

“It’s not a game day, but I’m still a bit tired of the game yesterday,” Jack replies, petting the bunny the closest to him. “Forty-five minutes I guess?”

“’Kay,” Bitty said, setting up his alarm.

“I don’t usually have a bed this crowded for my naps,” Jack says to the camera. “I’m always tragically alone.”

“Well I don’t usually wake up at dawn and run drills with professional athletes honey,” Bitty pointed out. “And you surprisingly work well with the camera, I thought I’ll have to fight to get you to say three words.”

“Well. You get used to it quickly. And it’s you so it’s easy. Now, nap.”

Jack pecked Bitty on the lips before dropping himself on the bed, ready to sleep. Bitty joined him.

The video is accelerated, Jack not moving one inch, turned towards Bitty and his arm around his waist. The rabbits move every now and then, looking for the warmest places. Bitty sleeps at first, but after a while switches to sitting (Jack’s arm still around him) and get the laptop on his nightstand on his lap so he can work with his headphones on.

When the alarm rings, the video slows down to its normal speed.

“You’re up, sweetpea?” Bitty asks, turning towards Jack, who is moving.

“Eeeeeeeeeearghwww.”

Cut. Bitty and Jack are now in the kitchen, still in their comfy clothes plus aprons, framed like they would be in any cooking show.

“Okay so Jack… What are we doing now?”

“We’re going to cook a ton of food to put in the fridge for when we’re too lazy to cook a meal this week or for our lunchboxes at work.”

“Right. This week lazy food is spinach lasagna…”

“No it’s dahl.”

“Jack we bought-”

Jack slams on the counter two big bags of lentils.

“Dahl.”

“Welp,” Bitty says, turning towards the camera. “I guess we’re going to eat curry for a while.”

Cut. It wasn’t a cooking vlog so Bitty moved the camera down to frame them, not their hands, from a three-quarter angle that could be artsy with the light from the window.

They are peeling and washing the vegetables together near the sink, when Bitty asks:

“Okay, so, Jack. Tell us about your meals.”

“So. Uh. We’re making an hectolitre of houmous and peanut butter right now, and dahl. All of those take like, 10 minutes to do, max. The longest is to let the dahl cook. It’s a stew with lentils and curry and sesame oil and all the vegetables you want. It’s vegetarian – no wait, it’s vegan. You should try. What else? Well. I like it. We won’t make it really spicy because I plan to get laid this wee-”

Cut.

“Okay, Jack,” Bitty says, threatening, “tell us about your meals _in general_.”

“Okay, haha,” Jack laughed, as he was cutting the onions that Bitty had peeled. “So uhm. I’m keeping a kosher kitchen? Meaning that there’s no pork and no shellfish and we’re keeping dairy and meat totally separated. And Bittle is vegetarian so since he moved in I switched to an almost fully vegetarian diet and I only eat meat out of the house like, one time a week. I just have chicken tenders in the freezer because they’re my comfort food on bad mental health days and I eat fish a few times a week? I can cook and store fish on dairy pans and areas so it’s easy. What else.”

“Do you cook often?” Bitty probes.

“Yes. I mean, not on roadies, but otherwise almost all my meals are homemade, by you or I or both depending on our schedules. We try to cook together because it’s nice, and when we make big quantities it’s easier?”

“Since when do you cook?”

Jack laughs at that.

“Haha, stop exposing me like that,” he says, now cutting some tomatoes. “Since I live in Providence I guess? Never cooked with my parents, they hired someone to cook until a few years ago, never cooked in my billet family – when I went to live one year with my grandparents’ after my overdose, my grandpa, who was a baker, tried to teach me Algerian specialities but it was way above my skills level. He was devastated, something about ‘_the family secrets would die with him_’ or something, as if he didn’t have four kids who all have kids themselves. I mean okay, none of them know how to boil an egg, but still.”

“Don’t worry, he taught me the family secrets since,” Bitty says to the camera.

“Yes he did, and sadly they involve way too much fat and oil. And after that,” Jack continued, “first year of college I was in a dorm, so I ate in the dinner hall every day, and after I lived at the Haus where yes, we had a kitchen, but we still ate at the dinner hall most days, because, you know. _Full flemme.”_

“This kitchen was criminally underused before I arrived, and I don’t even want to know in which state it is right now,” Bitty sighs, as he washes the carrots that were still muddy.

“Yeah but like, Bits,” Jack corrects him, “you used it criminally too.”

“Jack Laurent Zimmermann how _dare you-_”

“Like, first time we met,” Jack begins, grinning. “There’s this freshman kid who brought a _pie_ to practice. Cooked in the dorm kitchen and all. Got a slice of it.”

“He hated it,” Bitty explains to the camera. “He was in a sour mood for hours after.”

“I took a slice, that I loved, but also _not_ because of how fat it was, and I heard you tell Ransom that you used _pork lard_ inside. Pork, Bittle. Let me be sour.”

“Oh shit. Oh god. Pork. _Shit_. Yes, it was before I turned vegetarian. I became vegetarian like, one week after I started college, because there was no way in hell I could do that back in Georgia with a family like mine, but I still used _lard_ for a few months because of familial tradition… But yeah, I _guess_ I get why you never wanted to eat my baking.”

“That, and,” Jack begins, as he rinses the lentils, “well. My third year of college, I was still in the process of recovery of my eating disorder.”

Bitty stills at that.

“Mmh, love, you’re sure you want to talk about that?”

Jack didn’t reply right away, just the time for him to turn off the faucet of the sink.

“Well. It’s a 24-hours-with-me video, right? And me having had an eating disorder is a part of my everyday life. So, yes, let’s talk about it if it’s relevant.”

“Ok. Great. So. I’m not going to probe you on the subject to not pressure you about sharing stuff you don’t want to. Just say what you want, how you want.”

“Ok. Cool. So, hmm. I think I can tell that today I’m recovered, but most of my teenage years, I had a very unhealthy rapport to food. I, hmm- I was calorie counting? And by that, I mean that if a Coach told me to eat 3000 calories a day, I would check all the nutritional intake tables to make sure I had 3000 calories. If I was over, I purged, if I was below, I binged. And then I purged because I binged too much. I weighted everything that I ate and drank. If I was told 1g of protein, I took 1g of protein. If I was told to be careful with fats, I cut fats. At my worse at 18, I wouldn’t eat anything that wasn’t processed because if there was no nutritional table, I didn’t trust it. Oh, and most of my calories intake on party days was from alcohol. No lenience, no cheat days. I had to have a hyper-control on what I ate, because I believed that it was the only way for me to have a usable body for hockey. And above that I used to be a fat kid that was made fun of in school and in _rags_, between two pictures of my parents. It got better when, well – after my overdose, when I went to rehab and talked with specialists, but I was still on the path to recovery my two first years of college and like, half of the third? Had to relearn to have a relationship with food, to listen to my body and not only the coaches, to appreciate a meal.”

“Oh, wow.”

“I’m not gonna lie, I think that you and your love for good food helped me remember my own love for food.”

“_Oh, wow_.”

“It took time and relapses, but college was a good place to go back on tracks with my eating habits. But nowadays as a professional athlete I am supposed to have a _very_ controlled diet and be followed by the team nutritionist…”

“And you can’t have that.”

“It’s totally out of question that I go back to calories counting. What I did at first – I asked that the team nutritionist works with my own personal one, who’s specialised in EDs and recovery, and together we made meal plans for the week. Then they taught me how to make them myself and checked. Not to tell me ‘you need to add 500 calories on Wednesday’ or something like that, but by telling me ‘hey you need to add room for snacks here and maybe switch the vegetable salad for a potato one’, something that basically means the same thing but without the implication of the _numbers_. Also, my cheat days are compulsory. By now I do my plans all by myself and they just check from time to time to make sure I don’t do whatever.”

Bitty squeezes Jack’s hand, quickly.

“Wow.”

“Yeah, you said that already,” Jack tried to defuse.

“Do you have anything to say to anyone who listen and who would have eating issues? Something you wish you had been told?”

“Yeah. Get professional help.”

“What? That’s all?”

“Yeah? I mean, inspirational quotes can only help you so much, at the end of the day I’m just a guy who plays hockey, you need to talk with a pro about your issues, the sooner the better.”

Bitty just looks at Jack, done, but Jack doesn’t seem inclined to add anything on the subject.

“I don’t know what I’m gonna do with you.”

“Ok – hey, fuck, crisse, les putains de pois chiches sur le feu -” Jack yelped, jumping at the border of the frame to try to salvage the pan of chickpeas. “Uh.”

“Even if they’re overcooked, it will do, we’ll mix them once they’re cold,” Bitty tells him. “Keep the aquafaba, we’re goin’ to make chocolate mousse with it.”

“We can make _chocolate mousse_ with _chickpea water_?”

“This whole thing is slowing turning into a cooking vid…”

Cut. They’re in the kitchen again, but the angle is different – Jack is now emptying the pot of cooked dahl in various Tupperwares, and Bitty is doing with same with houmous. Jack may or may not steal some of the houmous to eat right away while Bitty is not watching.

“So, we’re back,” Bitty says. “We just finished cooking and we had time to do our chores for the day-”

“I think all the guys have a cleaning lady,” Jack explains “but I don’t. My parents had one, but – I hate to have someone else touch my stuff and clean my shit. It makes me really uncomfortable. Also when I arrived in college, I had _no idea_ of how to clean _anything_. I don’t think I even knew how to use a vacuum cleaner. I felt like an idiot.”

“I think way too many college kids don’t know how to clean anything…” Bitty adds. With this tone? He was very probably among them.

“Yeah, but still. I learnt to do everything from Google – and well, turns out I like cleaning stuff. Helps you focus on other things and appreciate the things you have. So, when I arrived in Providence – no cleaning lady for me. That, and I couldn’t have one anyway, as it’s hard to stay in the closet when someone comes three mornings a week to clean your home from top to bottom.”

“I see what you did here,” Bitty says, high-fiving Jack.

Something must have been weird during the high-five, because Bitty looks at his hand, frowning.

“Is that houmous? _Jack, did you eat houmous with your hand-”_

Cut. Bitty is moving the camera, Jack is talking but too far away so it’s unintelligible, when there’s the sound of the front door opening. Bitty stills, then goes to the front door, camera still in hand.

A guy with longish hair and a killer ‘stache is in the entrance, taking off his shoes as if he lived here.

“… Shitty?” Bitty asks.

“Bitty! My favourite baker! You’re home?” the guy says – the sound is quite bad quality, as he’s not wearing a mic. An arrow and a caption that says [Shitty – our friend from college, he’s decent. Sometimes] appear.

“It’s my home so yeah, it’s not surprising I’m here, but what are _you _doing here…?”

“Oh, you know, (Shitty is taking off his jacket) I need to study and Rans and Holst have a Mario Kart tournament with their colleagues so I thought it’d be quieter here- (he goes to take off his T-shirt)”

“Don’t get naked! I’m filming here!”

“Oh your 24 hours thingy is today? I thought it was next week- Well, sorry, I ain’t getting naked, that would take your hours blurring my incredibly huge penis-”

“**_YOU._**”

Before Shitty could move, Jack is jumping on him, and seizing him.

“Jackabelle! Let me down!”

“Never, you traitor!”

“Me traitor? Do I need to remind you what you did last week you turd?”

But Jack is not listening to him, instead lifting him above his head and walking towards the living-room - only to drop him on the couch.

Bitty is filming the whole thing in the background, so you can see him on the first plan. He has his hand in front of his face and looks straight at the camera, totally done.

“Do I want to know what happened for y’all to suddenly hate each other?” he finally asks, when the two friends begin roughhousing.

“No,” they reply, in the same breath.

Cut. Bitty and Jack are sitting on the couch, the biggest of the two rabbits between them. Shitty can be seen in the background, studying his law books at the table. He’s still dressed, and has a slice of pie and a cup of coffee in front of him. He’s wearing headphones.

“Ok, so, don’t mind Shitty,” Bitty says. “Jack, while you were napping, I asked on my Twitter if people had questions for you. Let’s answer a few…”

“I hate questions and interviews…”

“Sweetpea, it’s been ten hours you’re in interview, non-stop.”

“We were talking about _food_ and _hockey _so I _liked it_,” Jack whines, in between two bites of his afternoon snack (a peanut butter toast).

“What a big baby.”

Bitty sits more comfortably and drags the rabbit on his lap. He then begins to go through his Twitter to look at the questions.

“Ok, there’s a lot of them, I’m skimming those we answered to today, and those a hockey journalist could ask…” he says, “And the inappropriate ones,” he adds, an eyebrow raised.

“_Si c’est à propos de la taille de mon chibre, c’est trois fois la taille de celui de Shitty, soit environ deux mètres cinquante. Je dois m’en servir comme ceinture,_” Jack says, in French. It’s captioned, directly on the video: [I can’t believe that people dare ask inappropriate questions, what answer do they expect?]

“I don’t understand a word of what you said.”

“I’ll translate for you so you can caption it,” Jack proposes.

“My hero. So; first question, from Amelia47: _What is your favorite thing in Providence? _[A screenshot of the tweet is displayed on the video]”

“How close it is to Samwell and Boston. My friends made me entire spreadsheets when it was time to choose a team, but I already knew that Providence was my first choice, and the spreadsheets only confirmed it to me. It was easy for me to visit Bittle and have him come here, I could go see Shitty in Boston and he can come here as he pleases, case in point (Jack points his thumb above his shoulder, towards the area Shitty is sitting), and it’s a beautiful city with a lot of things to do but not _too_ big. Also the ocean is not far and that’s good.”

“Second question, from DanielHect-something? Gosh, y’all’s usernames… _What sports do you like, besides hockey? _That’s a good question._”_

“To do, swimming, I went to the pool twice a week with Holster and Chowder in Samwell, we still try to meet up when we can now, also swimming in the ocean or a lake are great. Running, too, I would very much like to try to run Boston’s marathon next year if my schedule let me. I have to run others before this one though, so I need to train. I finished some halves but I still need to do a full one. My father is training for it too, that would be great to run together. Also, biking. I like to bike and I go to the rink on my bike most days. On the other hand I _hate _yoga.”

“Honey, we’re doing yoga every day.”

“And I _hate_ that it helps me so much with flexibility and focus and everything. To watch, I closely follow the women’s leagues of hockey, soccer and European leagues of rugby. And pétanque.”

“I think Jack is the only person on the Earth who learned how to use a VPN just to catch the pétanque world cup, in the middle of the night.”

“Listen, my grandpa is a fan of pétanque? We watched it and played it all the time when I was a kid. Let me live, Bittle. I’m not the one who wanted to get plane tickets to Poland to catch the finals of _Ultimate_.”

“_They’re so happy and they try so hard_…”

Jack just shakes his head at that.

“_Ultimate_.”

“Oh, stop it, you. Question from Maxdidan89: _What is your childhood’s favorite show-”_

“Code Lyoko,” Jack replies, not hesitating one second.

“What is tha-”

“_Code. Lyoko,_” he insists, looking straight at the camera, before humming something that’s probably the theme song.__

“Ok, ok…” Bitty cuts him, before he begins to sing. “Never heard of this. Next question, from Tonks6337: _Why hockey? _Indeed, why hockey, Jack Zimmermann, son of Robert Zimmermann?”

“By this logic, if every kid has to do what his father did, I would be a _carpenter_, Bittle. It’s in my name. But yeah. Hockey. My father put me on skates as soon as there were skates that fit my feet, and I played hockey because that’s what my father did and I fell in love with it. My grandpa before him – he played hockey too, in a semi-pro team, _les As de Québec_…”

“So Las Vegas didn’t invent anything…”

“Vegas _never_ invented anything, except drive-through weddings. Anyway my grandpa was playing, he taught my father and my uncles but I think none of my uncles really liked it much. My father taught me after, he also played with my older cousins – one of them is in the AHL now, it’s his last year before retiring. He plays with the Rockets in Laval.”

“_David Zimmermann? _He’s your _cousin?_”

“Yeah, you didn’t know?”

Bitty takes a few seconds to think, letting the smaller of their two bunnies jump on his lap in the meantime.

“The one who invited us to his wedding this spring?”

“Ah, no. There’s four David Zimmermann in the family. And three Jacob and three Sarah. We’re not very original.”

“And I thought _my _extended family was a mess… So, next question, from YaBoiJamie: _I’m too lazy to work out every morning what should I do?_”

“Work out in the afternoon?”

Bitty laughs at that, but Jack doesn’t seem to realise what exactly was funny in what he said.

“What?”

“Honey, you will be the end of me. Next question. Oh, by Patrick Desmeules from the Aeros? Uh. ‘_You still owe me five bucks you… fillse dé tchienne?’_”

“Gothy tu me les brises avec tes fuckings cinq bucks, c’est bon, j’va-tu t’le payer ton grec. T’es vraiment la pire personne sale colon. Jamais vu ça.”

“… You know him?”

“Yeah. We were in the Q together. And, hmm, in school too.”

“Do I want to know?”

“No.”

Bitty sighs, but doesn’t try to push him. Jack begins to be distracted, anyway; time to wrap it up.

“One last question?” Bitty proposes.

“Yes. Is there any about you?”

“_Yes_, but it’s questions about _you¸ _so I haven’t picked them.”

“One?”

“Okay, okay,” Bitty concedes. “Wait… (he scrolls on his phone). Here. _Do you watch Bitty’s videos?_”

“No,” Jack says. When he sees that Bitty is side-eyeing him to push him to develop, he adds: “Well, from time to time, like his travel vlogs. But not the cooking ones, because, well, it’s not my thing? And why would I watch a YouTube video about cooking when, you know, the exact thing it’s talking about magically appears in my kitchen, 15 times, because he needs to be sure it’s perfect when he shoots?”

“What do you watch on YouTube?” Bitty probs.

“Mmh, _vulgarisation_? Is that the same in English? You know, videos about History, and archaeology, and linguistics and sciences and all that. I only watch YouTube in French. I also follow a few humoristic channels and some streamers – streamers all French because as I go to bed early, I can catch their live streams. For YouTube, I download a bulk of the new videos when I’m home and I watch them in the plane during roadies, because I can’t sleep in planes.”

“So on the plane, you apparently watch those, and _Code Niko_ episodes…”

“Listen, I didn’t,” Jack says, grabbing his phone, “But thanks for the reminder about how much I love this show, whoever asked the question. I’m going to download all the episodes tonight, I’m leaving for San Francisco in two days… Uh, Bits, do you think I can find the DVDs?”

“Really, Jack.”

“Bittle, I don’t think you realise. Just like I grew up playing hockey like my dad, our kids will grow up watching _Code Lyoko_ like me.”

“Oh boy.”

Cut. Jack is on the phone, at the other side of the room, you can’t hear him. An arrow and a caption appear, that read: [He’s on the phone with his agent]. You see him nodding, and he’s probably not saying much more than “mmhmmh”. He catches Bitty filming him, and he joins his hands as if to beg for salvation.

Bitty just chuckles. Jack makes a face at him, before saying – “_Oh, attends – j’ai un double appel”_ [captioned: “Wait, I’ve got a call waiting”] and he puts his agent on wait - Jack then sees who just called him, and, he’s desperate when he looks at Bitty. The video is edited to comically zoom in on his face of despair, and the caption [*it’s Coach Martin calling] appears. Then, a black screen, with the caption: [Jack doesn’t like phone calls much.]

Cut. They’re now doing some yoga on mats in the living-room. Shitty is with them, doing the well-known position of the slug (facefirst on his mat and probably sleeping). The rabbits are lying on the couch.

They do this for a little while, before they begin to stretch. Shitty is still dead to the world.

Cut. Jack is in the kitchen, with the camera, cooking a pan of vegetables. They’re very dark.

“I was busy getting my ass kicked at Mario Kart and I forgot the dinner,” he shushed. “I just told Bitty and Shitty I took care of it, not what I was cooking, so I’m going to order some take out and put it in plates. Shitty doesn’t have tastebuds anyway. He’s like… He’s a pelican. He just. Swallows the food and doesn’t chew.”

Cut. Jack discreetly went to the door to get the food from the delivery girl, you can hear Bitty and Shitty still playing Mario Kart in the background. Once the door is closed, Jack winks to the camera.

Cut. Shitty, Bitty and Jack are eating on the couch, you can hear the TV playing in the background. Shitty is gulping down the food without a second thought. Bitty says:

“That’s really good.”

“Thank you. I made it with love,’ Jack says, winking once again at the camera.

“That’s funny, because love tastes a lot like the Italian place down the street.”

“You love their food. I love their food. So it’s normal that food that I make with love tastes like theirs.”

“Jack. You burnt dinner, didn’t you.”

Jack doesn’t reply immediately, assessing the situation and how to get the fuck out of here.

“I. I love you, and you’re exceptionally beautiful tonight Bits.”

“You burnt dinner.”

“Oops.”

Cut. Bitty is probably sitting at the table, and is filming, ¾ back, Jack and Shitty. Jack is sitting on the couch, Shitty on the floor, between his legs, and Jack is trying to make some braids in the flow that Shitty is currently trying to grow back. Shitty is ranting about whether or not nuclear energy should be banned. Jack is quite involved in the debate.

Cut. Jack is in the bedroom, stashing away something in the drawers. He’s in nightclothes – only wearing boxers.

“9:30 PM… End of the day for you,” Bitty, behind the camera, says.

“Yeah. I prayed, showered, gonna read some before I go to sleep at 10,” Jack says, sitting on the bed and plugging in his phone.

“Can we debrief quickly?” Bitty asks, setting the camera so it frames the bed and making his way there to sit next to Jack. He’s wearing a big T-shirt and boxers, and has a towel around his neck and his hair is still wet.

“Sure.”

“How was your day?”

“Great. I mean, it wasn’t a big day, hockey-related, we only had light practice, we had a game yesterday, but it was fun. I don’t know if people will find the video interesting. Maybe you should do it again on a game day. Or on a roadie.”

“Is it for real? Jack Zimmermann _asking to be filmed_?”

“Haha – well, it’s you so it’s okay. And I like spending the day with you.”

“Aww you…” Bitty says, nuzzling Jack’s arm with his face.

“Uuh, stop embarrassing me now,” Jack chuckles, pushing him lightly. “My enemies and my mother are going to watch the video.”

“Yeah, okay, okay,” Bitty says, getting up. “Gonna work some, good night honey.”

“Night,” Jack replies, pulling him just enough for a peck on his cheek. “Make sure Shitty is still alive, I’m the one that shall take him out.”

Cut. Bitty is walking in the hallway, holding the camera close. He doesn’t talk loudly.

“Well, I’m wrapping up; I hope you liked the video, guys! Share, comment, thumbs up, all that jazz, you know the music, feedback makes one happy content maker. It was fun to do. I’m going to save all the rushes right now, and don’t worry Lardo, I’m going to make sure Shitty goes to bed before dawn. See y’all soon for my Canadian Crumble recipe! Bye!”

Outro of the video. Music credits appear, along with special thanks.

The last two seconds are just a black screen that read: [Shitty did go to bed before dawn.]


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Comments on the video

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I wanted to post yesterday but I'm on vacations and the cabin we're in doesn't have wifi :(  
Anyway !!! I'm posting today. It's a compilation of the kind of comments the video had. Hope you'll like !

**PVD FALCONERS ****🦅** **✔** @pvdfalcs  
Everyone, check out @omgcheckplease’s last video! 24 hours in the life of Jack Zimmermann – including a few quality chirps**🐤🐤**

**JANNIE **@JPRannelle  
_Replying to @pvdfalcs  
_BLESS 🙏🙏🙏

**MASHKOV’S WIFE **@ABCutie  
_Replying to @pvdfalcs  
_Terrible video; absolute lack of mashkov

**TATERTOT ****🍟** **✔** @alex_mashkof  
Big mood

**Alexander Banana  
**I think Zimmermann talked more in this interview than he did in the past two seasons and a half he spent in the NHL. How do you want to get to know him through 45 seconds of questions, always the same, always asked by someone new, at the end of a game he just played? This video was exactly what was needed to humanise him, something that the Falcs try hard to do with all their players.  
It’s easy to call him a hockey robot, to mock his monosyllabic replies, but when you see him here, you realise it’s _normal_; he’s just awkward as hell with people he doesn’t know. Like most of us are, really, if we spend our days watching YouTube videos. Add that English is not his first language. Here, he gets to talk to someone he knows, about his daily routine and whatever he wants. And you see that Eric _knows_ how to talk to him; he waits for his answers, doesn’t press him to reply in the second but let him gather his thoughts, and you get to see a part of Zimmermann that we never saw; the guy is witty, fun, and chirpy as fuck. He’s still close with his college friends, he has bunnies, he does stuff he hates and some he loves. It’s easy to see the stats and the baity headlines, and it’s even easier to remember there’s a human there.

**Allsaa **@alls45  
wsh on en parle du français de zimmrmn 😂😂😂 

**J-P. P **@newfinqueb  
_Replying to @alls45  
_il te sort des sacres et après il te glisse un putain oklm et y jure comme un charretier on dirait oim

**IMABRA **@fred_dpt  
je sais pas si vous avez déjà entendu sa daronne parler fr mais elle a pas l’accent quebecois du tout et elle sort que des injures continentales

**Jack Zimmermann ****✔**@jlz01  
Pendant mon enfance je parlais surtout avec ma maman (pas québécoise) et pour elle putain c’est un mot de liaison

**IMABRA **@fred_dpt  
« ma maman » 😂😂👶 t’as quell age

**Jack Zimmermann ****✔**@jlz01  
Je parlais aussi avec la tienne mais on racontait pas les mêmes choses. 🍆

**Ax. BTS  
**Lol I wish I had the key to zimmermann’s home and I could just. Drop by and eat his food and get my hair braid

**Hec_stt  
**Lol I wish he yeets me across the room and walk on me while yelling how disappointed hes in me 

**Ax. BTS  
**Truth that too

**T_Ght  
**Thank you, Jack. I’m a queer kid struggling and you really helped me since you came out. Knowing that you also had issues with eating makes me feel hope that one day ill also manage to go past this.

**Cheryy Biie  
** I’m sure you will!!!! Jack is a good role model to have and he has good advice

**T_Ght  
** I’m not sure I’m ready to talk to a professional. but maybe tomorrow I’ll begin to run in the morning

**Tempura Sakura**  
Listen 😭😭😭 ive been following jack for years since the q  
What happened with the overdose and alll. My heart was broekn for him. Awful, tragic. You’d think this guy who almost died would never get to have anything??? The heartbreaking soundbites we got from his parents. Terrible. Now we know that it was probably just too much pressure, with his dad, his sexuality, his mental health. I wish him from back then could see him from now , chilling on the couch paid by his nhl salary, next to his baker boyfriend with their two bunnis and with his college best friend just hangin out there 😭😭😭  
Im crying

**Brice45 **@briceirl  
Is someone going to mention the dildo on the nightstand at 00:23 that’s fucking disgusting

**Jack Zimmermann ****✔**@jlz01  
_Replying to @briceirl  
_ It’s not a dildo. It’s a professionally issued Falcs water bottle, victim of the tricks of the light

**Brice45 **@briceirl  
Sure Jan you’re a gross pervert with your sex toys out that’s all

**Jack Zimmermann ****✔**@jlz01  
Our dildos are not out in the open, they’re safely stored in a box in the nightstand where they won’t catch dust.

**Brice45 **@briceirl  
So here I am, talking about Zimmermann’s gross mountain of dildos 😂

**Jack Zimmermann ****✔**@jlz01  
We don’t have a mountain of dildos. We only have three. More won’t fit

**Brice45 **@briceirl  
… Won’t fit in the nightstand?

**Jack Zimmermann ****✔**@jlz01  
Won’t fit in my ass 

**Fiona Not From Shrek  
**Eric are you going to leak the chickpea chocolate mousse recipe tho

**Emma De**  
THE RECIPE ERIC

**Nadja3**  
THE RECIPE!!!! Also eric the French that Jack translated for you is WRONG. So, so, so, so wrong

**Bitty - OMG Check Please!  
** It can’t be that bad can it

**Nadja3  
** IDK ask your in-laws.

**Bitty - OMG Check Please!  
**JACK FUCKING ZIMMERMANN.

**P.D meule ****✔** @pdsmls-nhl  
I can’t believe that jack zimmermann, troll extraordinaire, only uses twitter to make sexual innuendos

**Bitty B. Bittle ****✔ **@omgcheckplease  
_Replying to @pdsmls-nhl  
_How can you not believe everytime he opens his mouth it’s to troll and chirp :’(

**DanyTheRed **@danilerouge  
All the falcs: lol jack is so fun and the chirp master haha  
All of us: yeah yeah sure 🙄  
Jack: surprise bitch

**Champomy King **@p-f_laval  
OK je suis pas trop les actualités de @jlz01 mais maintenant je comprends tout les memes le traitant de canard…. Ce chum est whipped bro 🦆🦆

**Jack Zimmermann ****✔**@jlz01  
_Replying to @p-f_laval  
_haha Bittle est tout autant un canard que moi… Mais c’est lui qui a validé le montage donc ça se voit moins !

**Rocket of Onta **@itsyaboyjamie  
What I expected: 30 minutes of Zimmermann’s personal training and diet, so that I can copy him and take over his place  
What I got: Zimmermann talking about mental health and he and his boyfriend chirping each other like an old married couple

**Jack Zimmermann ****✔**@jlz01  
Thanks everyone for your warm welcome of Bittle’s 24-hours with me video. I’m glad you watched it. My life may seem a bit boring and mundane and far from what you could imagine, but I honestly enjoy every day of it

**Jack Zimmermann ****✔**@jlz01  
I can only hope that you all get to have a life that makes you feel as full as mine, be it through your job, hobby, pets, family or friends.

**⚔**** BS Knight ****💩** @helloimshitty  
jackie don’t fucking think I forgot what you did just bc u braided my hair and fed me and gave me a bed for the night

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed ! Find me on tumblr [@insertatitlehere](https://insertatitlehere.tumblr.com)
> 
> Second part to arrive very shortly


End file.
